Second marriages are increasingly common in the lives of seniors today. Many seniors who remarry enjoyed a lifetime of love with a spouse who has passed away, only to happily discover love with someone new. While remarrying in your later years is an exhilarating chapter, the excitement of newfound love shouldn't overshadow some of life’s most serious decisions.

Unfortunately, many seniors choose not to update their estate plans when remarrying, which can cause unforeseen challenges, strain close relationships, and even spark infighting among family members.

Longer lifespans are largely responsible for the growing number of senior remarriages. As this trend continues, couples are blending families and finances in increasingly complex ways. Questions about what to do with a lifetime of accumulated assets are ones that couples rarely consider in their twenties, but they are essential for seniors. With 50% of seniors remarrying, elder law attorneys are hearing these questions more and more. Meeting with an experienced attorney can help you and your new spouse explore your options.

Prenuptial Agreements 
The biggest consideration for seniors remarrying is a prenuptial agreement. While Hollywood often portrays prenups as worst-case scenarios, they are actually the norm for senior remarriages and often provide the best protection for both spouses.

Open communication is the most important factor when drafting a prenuptial agreement. Typically, both spouses have children or family members they wish to maintain as beneficiaries on bank accounts, stocks, and other assets. A prenup ensures that the first spouse to pass away doesn’t unknowingly disinherit their children.

Managing a Lifetime of Assets
Pooling assets together and putting a new spouse's name on a title might seem intuitive when remarrying, but these decisions often have hidden pitfalls. Relying on blended families to simply “work it out” after you pass away is a risky strategy.

Assets often have strict limitations on how many beneficiaries can be designated, and property titling has legal complexities that vary by state. Newlyweds need a plan that protects their children and their new spouse simultaneously and there is rarely a way to do this effectively without creating a trust.

Taxes, Medicaid & Pension Considerations
Dying intestate (without a will) or even with a standard will that guarantees a trip through probate, adds unnecessary complexity to an already emotional time. When remarrying as a senior, you also have to weigh the financial impacts of combining incomes. Depending on your situation, remarrying could:

• Bump you into a higher tax bracket
• Alter your Social Security benefits
• Disqualify you from a former spouse's pension
• Impact your eligibility for Medicaid

Elder law attorneys with financial planning experience are vital for understanding your full range of options. Proper planning ensures you are prepared when the IRS comes collecting or when an institution changes its terms of service.

Trusts
Trusts give trustors (you and your spouse) the most flexibility and control. Trying to evenly divide assets by constantly amending wills, life insurance policies, investments, and property deeds can be incredibly cumbersome.

Creating a trust allows you to dictate exactly how, when, and to whom your assets are distributed. This is the most reliable way to ensure a new spouse is well cared for, while still preserving an inheritance for your children.

Conclusion
Falling in love with someone new always impacts the other people we love. Sometimes blended families grow closer; sometimes they don't. Remaining loyal to a new spouse can sometimes make it difficult to navigate older family dynamics. While this isn't strictly an estate planning issue, it is a common reality of remarrying later in life.

It is crucial to plan for these changes proactively so you don't make knee-jerk decisions during highly emotional times. Finding love as a senior brings exuberance and joy, don’t let a lack of planning result in unintended consequences. Make sure your most heartfelt desires are carried out for both you and the people you love.
 
If you want to ensure that you make the right decisions for your own family when considering life and estate planning decisions, feel free to sit down and talk with us for a free consultation by calling (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located office at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.​ Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been providing our clients with Trusted Counsel and Proactive Solutions for over 30 years, and we look forward to many more! ​

When someone comes into our offices after caring for a loved one with declining health, often they have been a caretaker for a long time. It is not uncommon for these clients to have drained many of their own resources, whether those be personal or financial. They may have been caring for their spouse in their home and realized it was no longer a safe environment, or the daily medical assistance needed to provide a safe home may be too overwhelming to administer. Either way, when the well-spouse begins considering moving their suffering partner into a nursing home, they often start with the resources around them, whether it be close family members or others in the community.

Over the last few months, we have had the pleasure of working with a family who came to us after consulting with one of their closest friends. These two men have lived in the same neighborhood together for several years and had taken counsel with one another through good, bad and challenging times. Both were caring for their wives, while contemplating transitioning them into a nursing home. While being so occupied by caring for their wives, they hadn’t been able to keep in touch like they had just a few years before. So, when one friend told the other he had recently transitioned his wife to a nursing home, the other confided in him that he too, was contemplating making the same difficult decision.

I’m sure many personal stories were shared between these two longtime friends. I’m confident these discussions helped them cope and endure their mutual circumstances. That’s what friends and neighbors are for. One of the stories shared with us about their conversations, was the referral of a book called the Complete Guide to Caring for Aging Loved Ones. Authored by Robert Riekse of Focus on the Family, this book provides advice for caregiving loved ones and for those transitioning another into a nursing home. Here is a summary from Amazon, “Whether you're preparing for the responsibility or are in the midst of caring for an elderly loved one, this complete guide from Focus on the Family provides the practical information you need―and a spiritual and emotional lifeline. Topics include burnout; physical, emotional, and mental changes in aging; medical, financial, and legal help; elder abuse; choosing a care facility; and end-of-life decisions. Caregivers will also learn what the Bible says about caregiving and the keys to effectively fulfilling that role. True stories throughout the guide share common concerns and a sense of support from those who have been there.”

I understand the challenges of taking care of our loved ones with declining health cannot simply be answered with a book. However, it is important that we are willing to accept help from others and look out for resources in our communities that are there to assist us with our caregiving. I do not receive any financial benefit from recommending this book, and it is just one of dozens of great editorial resources available. However, I can say that it has assisted a least two clients in the last year while they managed caring for their loved ones in the home, and while transitioning them into nursing homes.  This story most importantly highlights the importance of reaching out to others in our lives for advice and help.
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Berger Estate & Elder Law, P.A. has been serving Kansas City for over 30 years -- providing Trusted Council with Proactive Solutions. Call us today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com , or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140, Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

Over the years we’ve had our fair share of difficult situations to handle. These often have a wide array of challenges, that one can only imagine working in elder law for over 30 years. The most difficult challenge of all is seeing families struggle through difficult times. Our responsibility in these situations is to help guide others through their circumstances and provide them with the best options to remedy their situation.

But as the saying goes, “what has been done can’t be undone,” and this is often the feeling someone has when a another accuses them of neglect and abuse.  Thankfully, we have been able to help clients that have been falsely accused in these situations, but often these issues can be better managed if handled differently early on.

For first time caregivers, and especially those caring for someone they love, it is often easy to take on too much. This can lead to feelings of resentment and regret, and questions of “what if?” can start to settle in. This may damage loving relationships and leave one susceptible to malicious accusations by financial institutions, social workers, caregivers, extended/out-of-town family members and outsiders that aren’t as involved in the care taking responsibilities as the person taking on the majority of these tasks.    

The timeline of the story often goes in stages, but the stages are reoccurring for many spousal and adult-child caretakers. The worst-case scenario is one we see all too often and that is one that includes a caretaker being accused of neglect or abuse. Often, when someone is diagnosed with some form of dementia, a loved one, like a well-spouse or adult-child will step in and try to be the best caretaker they can be. Reasonably, this is thought to be the best option, as they are the closest and most knowledgeable person in the room about the day-to-day ailments of the sufferer. Additionally, they have more invested emotionally and physically than anyone. They are willing to go above and beyond in their care, literally doing whatever it takes to help their suffering spouse or parent.

The pitfalls of caregiving are well documented, but possibly the biggest is when you try to take too much on our own. The exact time, when too much is too much, is hard to recognize and that is why it is helpful to be in constant communication with others. Many delay asking for help for numerous reasons, but the one we see most is guilt. The guilt of asking for help, the guilt of blaming yourself for the situation and the guilt of not being able to handle it all on your own. But, this shouldn’t be the case and this reasoning is usually unjustified and simply not true. Dementia is no one’s fault and calling out other stretcher-bearers to help carry the burden, as soon as possible is often the right thing to do.

Two suggestions we continually make to clients under these circumstances are: (1) bring on more than one stretcher bearer. These could be friends, neighbors, care-givers, your church community, or social workers etc., or (2) consider a nursing facility and don’t feel guilty about it. These recommendations may sound simple, but they are often ignored and unheeded.

Ask for help before it’s too late. Too many times we’ve been contacted by a well-spouse or adult child after a third-party institution or organization has reported them for neglect or abuse. These cases are often concocted stories from third-party sources, that care more about protecting themselves than the individuals involved. Others, often blame the well-spouse or adult child for anything and everything that happens to the individual suffering from dementia, because they may be insecure of their own involvement with the situation. Having multiple stretcher bearers, with different experiences and perspectives offers families more lines of communication and observation. This not only relieves some of the pressure from caretaking, but provides a diverse system of checks and balances. In a way, it is doing your due diligence.

Unfortunately, the legal system has seen its fair share of exaggerated elder abuse and neglect claims, however with the right counsel, protecting yourself from these claims is possible. Not to belittle these cases or portray them all as being unwarranted, as many aren’t, but unfortunately, we live in a society where everyone wants to try to blame somebody else, even when there is no one to blame.  As the saying goes, "no good deed goes unpunished." 
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Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been finding solutions throughout Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions for many. We’ve been helping individuals plan, navigate and conquer the challenges of caretaking for over 30 years. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

“When visiting an elderly relative or friend, are you often at a loss for what to talk about? After the initial pleasantries, do the minutes drag on? You may very well love this person but find yourself struggling to carry on a conversation. An hour can seem endless. If only you could think of something interesting to talk about!”

The genesis of writing If Only You Would Ask occurred while Joan had been caring for her father-in-law. In the book, Joan lists over forty-two topics and four-hundred engaging questions to assist in reflecting and conversing with our loved ones. Joan was encouraged to write If Only You Would Ask after visiting her father-in-law for five years, often sitting around the kitchen table or living room, just to have a little conversation and provide a bit of comfort. As her father-in-law continued to stay in his own home, aging, and alone in northern Minnesota, Joan made regular trips to his residence. After so many visits, it felt like the conversations had run dry, and Joan felt they may have been losing their heartening effects. Upon reaching out to her mother for advice, Joan was given a notebook filled with a list of questions to ask, to help spur the conversations, so they could learn more about one another. The sad part of this story, is that after taking the notebook of questions over to her father-in laws house, he had passed, leaving so many unanswered questions.

On a personal note, I had a similar experience with my grandfather, growing up, visiting him on a yearly basis, at his home in south Florida. Some of my favorite childhood and teenage memories are visiting him, watching sailboats go in and out of harbor and eating Hostess treats for breakfast! In the evenings we would often watch the history channel and documentaries about the 40’s and 50s, knowing that he experienced and knew so much about an era so often talked about, but less remembered every year.

After re-watching Band of Brothers recently and listening to the personal testimonies of the soldiers before each episode, I’m disappointed I didn’t ask my grandpa more about his childhood and what it was like fighting during World War II. If only I had asked and knew how to approach certain topics in conversation in a more comfortable way. 

Some of the topics included in If Only You Would Ask are Core Beliefs, Relationships, Unique Experiences and even Sports and Politics, but these are just a few of the many included in this comprehensive how-to. “With forty-two topics and over four hundred questions, If Only You Would Ask provides the framework for tapping into memories that may not have been thought about or talked about for years! You and the person you are visiting will both enjoy your time together. In fact, you will look forward to your next time together.”
“Every person has stories to share, If Only You Would Ask!"

​You can buy If Only You Would Ask! on Amazon Today.
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Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been finding solutions throughout Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions for many. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

Probate

​Confession, I listen to a lot of radio.  I’ve always enjoyed this time in my car for a quick errand or even a 10-hour road trip cross country. In these moments I learn things I didn’t know, listen to other perspectives that I feel enhance my own and even sometimes change my opinion of things.  An unexpected change from all of this has been the recent enjoyment I’ve been getting from commercials.

This may be because I recently unplugged the cable at home and went all “Wi-Fi over everything”, but recently I’ve inherently noticed that I missed the slight ambush of being disposed to different types of marketing, whether it be abrasive, deceptive, informative or otherwise. All things (or advertisements) considered, the radio has the most entertaining commercials out there. This may be because it leaves more up to the imagination to the listener than watching television or I’m just simply more engaged when driving my car. I guess you should probably watch out for me on the road.

Recently, I’ve heard some good advertisements about estate planning. During these commercials they describe multiple benefits for individuals who are interested in protecting and preserving their values and assets. Of, course as an Estate & Elder Law attorney, we agree in these benefits, but estate planning isn’t always for everyone.  According to these ads, a trust is the “be all end all” of estate planning to avoid probate. And, although it is true that a trust has several benefits and avoids cumbersome interactions with a Probate Court, if it’s not handled properly, even planners with the best intentions, may not avoid the process completely.

So, What Type of Trust Do I Need?
First things first, I can’t really answer this question without some information from you, but what I can do is describe, for the purposes of this article, the option I heard being touted on the radio, a living trust (or whatever fancy name someone want to give it). A living trust is a written document that you create with an attorney during your lifetime that may help avoid probate. You may choose to fund it, or leave it unfunded until your death. By "fund it," I mean that you make it the legal owner of your assets, some or all of them, it’s up to you. For example, you might choose to retitle your bank accounts, investments, or even your house into the name of your trust. If you do, you will no longer be the owner of those assets, the Trustee of your trust will be. However, since you will most likely be named the Trustee during your lifetime, you essentially still retain control of your assets. Your trust will contain provisions for management of the transferred assets during your lifetime and will also include what happens to those assets upon your death. In the latter regard, it can function as substitute for a will. Most often you, the creator of the trust, is the trustee, although sometimes the creator will name a spouse, child or bank as a Co-Trustee.

Revocable
A living trust is revocable, meaning that you can end it at any time. You, as its creator, reserve the right to amend, revoke, change it or the trustee. Because you retain these rights, you are treated by the IRS as if you still own the property (which is primarily why this isn’t the best option for some). Therefore, you will report on your Income Tax Return, e.g. Form 1040, any income generated by the transferred assets. And, so long as you are a Trustee or Co-Trustee, the trust will not have to file a separate income tax return. The IRS treats you as the owner because you really have not parted with control. You can take the assets out of the trust for your personal use at any time and for any reason.

So Why Create a Living Trust?
First, the assets you have transferred to your trust prior to death will avoid probate. The primary purpose a Probate Court serves when someone dies is to facilitate the transfer of title from the person who died to the “rightful” beneficiaries. In the case of a funded living trust, the trust, which is the legal owner of the assets, did not die and the Probate Court does not get involved.

Avoiding Probate means that assets can be transferred after death by the trustee to the intended beneficiaries without the same delay as when the Probate Court is involved. Avoiding probate also means that you can avoid Probate Court fees and accompanying attorney fees. Secondly, a trust keeps affairs private. Unlike a will which is a public document filed with Probate Court at death, a Living Trust is private and is not available for inspection by the public at your death. Third, the Living Trust will ensure that your assets are managed for your benefit in the event that you become incapacitated. Should you become either physically or mentally disabled, then your successor trustee will manage the trust and its assets in accordance with the terms established by you.

The Need to Fund the Trust
You will only receive many of the benefits if you actually fund your Living Trust. Some people create a terrific Living Trust and don’t fund it, either intentionally or by accident. If it is intentional, the person likely has a "pour-over" Will, so in the event the person owns any assets in their name at the time of their death, their "pour-over" Will states those assets are to be added to the created, but unfunded, Living Trust. However, all such assets will be subject to probate at death before they are added to the trust. This is because any assets which you own in your own name at the time of your death are subject to probate, even though they will ultimately be added to the assets held in a Living Trust. You should carefully and continually review assets held in your own name (whether you own them now or acquire later) to be sure that such ownership is appropriate if your desire is to avoid probate upon your death.

A decision to delay funding could just be the burdensome nature of having to transfer everything over to the trust  (dealing with all the banks that hold your CDs, your brokerage account or individual companies, doing new deeds to your real estate etc.). However, this responsibility can be passed along to the appropriate individuals with a properly drafted Power of Attorney.

Two strong arguments for using and funding a Living Trust are if you have out of state property or a family that is estranged or prone to disputes. For out of state property, a Living Trust that holds such property will avoid the need to go through that state's probate procedures and paying a lawyer from that state to handle the probate, usually at considerable cost.

If there is a second marriage or children who do not get along, then a Living Trust may be best because it will be harder for one of the other potential beneficiaries to cause trouble for trouble's sake. Remember that a Living Trust is a private document and disputes are often caused by individuals who think they know what they are or aren’t entitled too. Much of our time in these situations is spent with individuals (or their attorneys) whom assumed they were beneficiaries, but were not.

The Probate Process
Whether probate avoidance is "good" or "bad" can be subjective. To answer this question, we need to define exactly what probate is (because it’s often misunderstood) and then overlay the process on your financial and family circumstances to determine whether probate avoidance makes sense for you.
In general, when a person dies the function of the probate court is the following: to ensure if there was a Will, it is the decedent's true and last Will; to ensure that the decedent's assets are safeguarded and protected from waste, theft, or neglect; to ensure that bills and debts are paid; and, lastly, to make sure that what remains is paid to the intended beneficiaries in accordance with the decedent’s will.  
In essence, the purpose is to oversee the transfer of title of the decedent's assets from the decedent's name to the decedent's beneficiaries, making sure along the way that all the assets are accounted for and the bills are paid.

Is Probate lengthy and Expensive?
To expedite the process, an Executor may make distributions to estate beneficiaries prior to concluding the Probate Court process. You must always be careful, however, to retain sufficient assets, in order to pay creditors and any taxes (property, income or otherwise) that may be discovered to be due. The Executor is personally liable if there is a shortfall. Usually, most of the wait time for an Executor is the 6-month claims period in Kansas and 1-year in Missouri (that allows creditors or beneficiaries to attest a will) to end.

If beneficiaries are transferred assets and then unpaid bills or “new” beneficiaries appear, payouts, court costs and attorney fees may rise, and if you made distributions before the Probate Court concluded the Probate process, you just transferred all the financial assets of the estate! Being patient, following the probate protocols and having a knowledgeable attorney in these circumstances is critical. Most of our probate cases are handled in just over 6-months (in Kansas) or 1-year (in Missouri), due mostly to the claims timeline requirement.

Probate should not be an inherently expensive process. However, I have found that probate becomes expensive for three reasons. The first is when the family is dysfunctional to begin with and now that mom and dad have both died (the ones holding it together), the beneficiaries' (usually children) true nature is revealed, and they argue over who gets what. All of a sudden, once forgotten Items acquire amplified significance. In such disputes people tend to act in a manner not economically justified and end up hiring lawyers to resolve personal matters. At this point, counseling is needed more than lawyering and sometimes I think law school should include a few counseling courses into their curriculums.

A second reason probate becomes expensive is because the named Executor is neither particularly trustworthy nor knowledgeable. Telltale signs are usually when you notice the Executor "dragging their feet" the entire time, trying to live in the decedent's house rent free for as long as he can, co-mingling personal funds with those of the estate, and not communicating with family members or beneficiaries (who then hire their own lawyers to find out what is going on). All of this delays the process and results in additional costs for everyone, and not just financial.

 A third reason is due to an ambiguous or inconsistent scheme presented by a beneficiary that the decedent left behind to dispose of his property. This can be due to a poorly drafted will or because the decedent had assets titled jointly with some children and not with others, but made promises to those children not on the title that certain assets would pass to them under their will. This is the classic "I have titled my house and bank account jointly with my daughter, but she knows when I die she should share it equally amongst her siblings." Right! This is a formula for trouble if there ever was one, unless there is very good trust among the entire family.

In summary, the probate process and probate court avoidance through living trusts has its pros and cons. There is no right or wrong solution to this question, but for those with assets they hope to someday pass along to a beneficiary, being informed and planning ahead is essential. What matters most is that someone takes the time to discuss with you how each method would work in your situation, what advantages might benefit you and what the disadvantages are for each type of estate plan. This is where a lawyer who is well versed in estate planning and administration can play a valuable role for you and your loved ones.

​Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been serving Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Council with Proactive Solutions. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

Many of the people we meet with have made the decision to set up a revocable living trust (RLT). This probably isn’t surprising, given we are estate & elder law attorneys, but what is surprising, is the number of times we hear individuals or couples have established a trust and NEVER got around to funding it, they are disappointed and feel misled by their previous representation and are coming to us for help.

One possible reason for this is that it can be a time-consuming process. But, most of the time it is because clients were under the impression that funding was almost complete at the time of signing a trust or that the attorney hired to establish the trust was going to do it afterwards.

RLT’s go by several different names. Over the last few years, it seems every law firm has branded their own term that fits their own clientele. This is good marketing, but often confuses clients into thinking they are getting an entirely different product. Some names I’ve recently come across were Legacy Trust, Wealth Preservation Trust, Estate Trust, and the list goes on. Rest assured, these products all “basically” can do the same things, customized to a specific client’s situation. Some of the benefits of RLT include the ability to continuously control assets during and after your lifetime, provide for children of any age, avoid the costs, publicity and burdensome process of probate proceedings, and limit your federal tax burden. However, with increases in the Federal Estate Tax Exemption, tax planning has become less of a focus.

It’s important to know that none of these benefits will be realized if the trust is never funded. This is especially unfortunate since the concept of funding is fairly simple. Funding includes changing the names on assets such as financial statements or the title to a house or car, to the name of your trust. It also entails changing beneficiaries on financial accounts and other non-title assets to the trust. Title, insurance and financial organizations can be helpful in assisting their clients with these changes, but after someone dies, they often can be difficult to work with, frequently going beyond their own legal requirements to make these changes for their customers. As the saying goes, they love taking your money, but when it comes to giving it back, “good luck.”

Many Estate planning attorneys that write RLTs for their clients do not fund trusts after they are executed and if they do, charge additional fees. This is because the time involved funding trusts is unpredictable, as institutions have different requirements, and these requirements seem to change daily, depending on who you talk to on a given day.

Setting up an unfunded trust is like buying a car, and not putting any gas in it. Before discussing a trust, make sure you check to see if the tank is full. Make sure you're able to get where you want to go when it counts. Many attorneys will talk about the wonderful features of a trust, but never put anything in it, that will help you do what you thought you had planned for it to do.  
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Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been finding solutions throughout Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions for many. We’ve been helping our clients establish trusts tailored for their desires and needs and being upfront about trust funding, doing it for you or helping you every step along the way. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.
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Alone for the Holidays
Christmas is a wonderful time for families to come together and celebrate those they love. Spending time with those closest to us, by getting family and friends together this time of year, for many of us brings memories and experiences we cherish for the rest of our lives. While we enjoy ourselves and celebrate the Christmas season this year, it is important that we also remember members of our family and communities, who may be experiencing loneliness or unexpected solitude.

As our society ages, every year older people makeup a greater percentage of our population. Furthermore, every year, more of our elderly population as reported feelings of loneliness and isolation. Sadly, our society is placing less and less emphasis on caring for this segment of society. It is important that we go out of our way to fill this widening gap.

This Christmas provides a great opportunity to connect and spend time with the elderly in our own lives and, who knows, you might even learn something you didn’t know when you ask uncle Clark about his days as a bachelor.

While planning, preparation and activities fill our calendars this time of year, here are some suggestions for remembering our older relatives and neighbors.

Say Hi
In a world that almost plans for everything, including play dates and scheduling for toddlers, it is easy to forget it wasn’t too long ago when people were thrilled to have their friends and family unexpectedly pop-in and say hello! Well, the previous generation is well accustomed to this and just may be overly joyed that you did. Stopping by may be grabbing a cup of coffee with your loved one and having a short conversation, or going on a walk through their neighborhood. If you live further away, and can’t just pop-in, remember to call over the holidays to catch-up and say hello. Don’t forget to mention you would be happy to also receive a call from them. Sometimes, just reminding others we are available is all it takes to start a great conversation or rekindle a relationship.

Help with the Decorations
Many of us spend ample time decorating inside and outside of our homes over Thanksgiving and Christmas. This decorating not only takes time to do, but it takes time to planning and shopping for what we think is just the right touch for the season. For elderly with mobility concerns and living alone, often, decorating for this festive season falls to the wayside. This year, take the opportunity to spend with an elderly person in your life helping decorate their home. In a brash move of selfishness, you may even get to utilize some of the decorations you haven’t put up in a number of years, that’s packed away in one of those 50 boxes of Christmas decorations in your basement.

Make Sure They’re Warm and Safe
Temperatures can linger on being warm this time of year, but when winter sets in, it always seems to set in so quickly. When making sure the elderly are safe this time of year, it is essential they are warm from the changing temperatures. Making sure furnaces are running properly and plenty of warm blankets are left out on furniture around the house are good ways to be prepared for the winter months.  Outside of the house it is helpful to check on any stairs or railings that may become icy during the winter. Offering some form of ice-melt on surfaces that ice and snow accumulate is a good precaution or even offering to clean it yourself after a storm can be just the kind of Christmas cheer a loved one was hoping for.

​Go Shopping Together or Attend a Play/Concert
Before heading out to grab another gift for that distant relative you never know what to get, stop by  to see if your elderly neighbor or relative would like to go along. They may also need to grab something from the store and grabbing a ride with you might mean they don’t have to wait around before it’s too late to do it.  While the weather is a bit frightening this time of year, you may also feel inclined to offer help with a doctor’s appointment or grabbing their prescriptions from the drugstore.

Invite them Over
A wild concept I know, but inviting multiple levels of generations together is something we tend to only do around the holidays, aside from running our own kids around town. This is one of the reasons the holidays are so joyful, because taking the opportunity in getting diverse groups of people together has many rewards. Make Christmas a time for everyone in your circle and being willing to expand it by opening your doors to an elderly neighbor or loved one, to an event or occasion you haven’t invited them to before. 

​Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!
Most importantly, remember not to take on more than you can handle. Reach out to other family members and neighbors for help, considering bringing others along for companionship and help.  This Christmas Season, give the invaluable gift of your time and warmth to someone in need of a little bit more cheer this time of year. Remind the elderly in your life how much you care for and appreciate that they are in your life.

Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been serving Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

Discussing your estate planning over the holidays may not feel like the best timing, but there may not be a perfect time. These discussions are vital for carrying out your wishes and making life easier for everyone around you. That’s why it may be easier to start asking yourself and dropping hints to others about some of the most important issues during the holiday's, so you can work your way into taking them on directly.

​The death of a friend or an event in the news can often be a natural segue into a discussion about your wishes. To get the gravy ‘flowin' this fall, we put together a list that might be helpful, with the Ten Most Important Elder and Estate Planning Decisions to Discuss with Your Family Over the Holidays.
 
1.       Who do you want to talk to your doctors if you are too sick to do it yourself? Do you have a second
          choice for a backup?
 
2.       Who do you trust to handle your finances if you are not able? Would you like them to be able to act
          immediately, or only if you are not able?
 
3.       If you are terminally ill, are there any limits to the medical treatment you would find acceptable?
 
4.       Do you really know what is meant by a “DNR” – “Do Not Resuscitate Order”?
 
5.       Are your important papers and financial information kept in one place? Who besides you knows where
          this is? What about a safe deposit box? Will anyone have access to it if you are disabled or upon death? 
          Do you have a computer? Do you have a list of passwords? Where is it kept?
 
6.       Have you made any plans for long term care? How will you pay for it?
 
7.       Do you want to be buried or cremated? Where?
 
8.       How do you want your estate distributed after your death? Do you have a will or trust? Have you
          reviewed it lately? Are there any special needs that must be taken care of for your family?
 
9.       How are your accounts titled? Are there any joint accounts that could create unexpected consequences?
 
10.    Do you have an attorney, accountant or financial adviser? Who are they? Does anyone else know them?

​Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. has been serving Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.

Some stories are just better when they have a happy ending and I guess I’ll spoil it for you. This one does. But then again, is there ever a client story we share that doesn’t? Fair warning, this is almost a story about Jack and Diane, you know, the one about “two American kids doing the best that they can.”

Fred and Charlene Henrick grew up in Kansas City, Missouri following WW2, after Fred returned from the war. Their life following was one that resonates with the times. Fred took a job with Ford Motor Company at the Claycomo Plant when they opened in 1951. Charlene was a math tutor for high schoolers, working out of their house and soon would be raising three children. After 35 years, when the kids were all grown and had moved away, the Henricks decided to move out to the “country”, to Olathe, Kansas.

Well, a lot has changed in Olathe since then and the same would be true for the Henricks. Soon after moving to Olathe, one of their daughters, Aubrey, moved back from Texas, so the grandchildren could be closer to Grandma and Grandpa.

After leaving Ford and moving out to Olathe, Fred continued to work part-time with a local mechanic and Charlene continued to tutor math, although often for younger children like her grandkids. The Henricks' hope was that these finances would be enough to pay for retirement and leave a little legacy for their children, like their home Aubrey was already taking care of all by herself. Having Aubrey down the street wasn’t just good for “free” babysitting and keeping the home safe for her parents, because as time went on, Aubrey was also beginning to spend more time taking care of Fred. 

Eventually, Fred’s physical health started to decline faster, while his dementia also seemed to be getting worse. It came time that Charlene and Aubrey could no longer safely care for Fred and they began looking for home health or Skilled Nursing solutions. When discovering the costs of Skilled Nursing, they quickly realized that their finances would not even allow Fred to reside in a community for much over one year and after that they believed they would have to sell their home, which would be all that was left of 65 years of being together. Even though Fred is 93, they were hopeful he would live much longer than a year, so they reached out to a friend who had assisted in moving both of her parents into a local Nursing Home.

Hearing the wonderful family stories of the Henricks is one of the benefits of practicing Estate Planning and Elder Law. However, many families we talk to don’t consider estate planning soon enough to be prepared for long-term care when they need it.  And, this often changes good stories into bad. Thankfully, with the proper guidance, waiting until later or when the need arises in life doesn’t mean it’s too late.

After reviewing the Henricks case, they looked to be in good position for applying for Medicaid. This process is fairly straightforward, if you know the hoops to jump through and are prepared to handle continued correspondence with KanCare. Anyone who has filed for Medicaid knows that inevitably, the process is tedious and requires a lot of patience.

Although these rules seem to be a bit fluid at times, one can usually know which part of the application will raise concerns with KanCare, so it is best to be prepared before this happens. To KanCare’s credit, their concerns are almost always valid, given the high level of fraud they must deal with and being stewards of government funds.

When KanCare approved Fred for nursing home benefits, he was assessed a patient obligation to the nursing home. This obligation was basically Fred’s social security and pension income, less a monthly needs allowance. Although we were pleased to see that Fred was approved for Medicaid, we questioned why none of his income had been allocated to Charlene. After further communication with KanCare, it was determined that Charlene would receive a portion of Fred’s income to help her pay her own shelter expenses. The ultimate result is that Fred’s monthly out of pocket cost of care was $650.

More Nursing Homes are beginning to accept Medicaid as payment for care. However, many do not accept residents unless they are already approved or have hired an Elder Law attorney for help.

Berger Estate & Elder Law P.A. have been assisting families and seniors with Medicaid Planning and Long-Term Care Planning in Kansas City for over 30 years providing Trusted Counsel with Proactive Solutions. Give us a call today at (913) 491-6332, visit our website berger-lawfirm.com or stop by our conveniently located offices at 11233 Nall, Suite 140 Leawood, KS 66211 for more information.​